Have you managed to find a replacement therapist for the DBT? Or at least a counselor to talk to? Everything you're describing sounds exactly like what I go through during a depressive episode -- a total lack of luster, no drive, no passion... just existing.
*hug*
If you can find the right therapist, I have faith that you can regain your passion, et al. It takes time, but it'll be worth it in the end.
As always, I'm here if you ever need to vent about anything.
I have a new therapist, albeit a student therapist, who's trained in DBT...I went ahead and scheduled the first session of the semester with him, but sometimes I worry I won't ever find the same camaraderie I had with my first therapist. I know she had her warts and flaws, some fairly serious ones too, but I felt I could trust her and that she would understand almost anything I told her about. I have nothing in common with this young, male, smarty pants therapist, but D and I had many of the same illnesses and allergies, and she was there from day one, so if I was having an off day or week, she
understood.
What's sad is she's probably old enough to be my grandmére, whereas the newbie, Du, is much closer to my age. I don't know. Maybe I'm just scared to let her go. Regardless, I'm not quite ready to give up entirely.
*hugs Mlle Antichrist* Thank you so much. I feel like a whiny brat so often, but you're always there to give a kind word. I really, really appreciate it. And if you don't mind a headache, I have a 'cure' for insomnia...>.> *offers a mallet*