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Community => Politics and Government => Topic started by: Rabbit of Caerbannog on January 06, 2012, 10:57:02 am

Title: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Rabbit of Caerbannog on January 06, 2012, 10:57:02 am
According to the conspiracy nuts at Exopolitics that is. Apparently President Obama during the 1980s, and under the handle of Barry Soetoro, once teleported to the red planet via "jump room" with other volunteers and his entire presidency is a ruse to cover it up. Or something. Try reading the article, it truly is astounding:
http://exopolitics.blogs.com/exopolitics/2011/11/mars-visitors-basiago-and-stillings-confirm-barack-obama-traveled-to-mars-1.html (http://exopolitics.blogs.com/exopolitics/2011/11/mars-visitors-basiago-and-stillings-confirm-barack-obama-traveled-to-mars-1.html)

I would've submitted it to CTSTDT but someone beat me to it. Still, I really hope it makes the cut.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: ironbite on January 06, 2012, 11:08:36 am
...wait what?

Ironbite-no seriously...what?
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Art Vandelay on January 06, 2012, 11:12:02 am
I also heard he threw an excersize ball filled with custard at an old lady in a spruce tree some time betweens the months of June, 1976 and April, 1994. As such it is clear from the fact that he didn't upload it to Youtube that he is not qualified to be a taxi driver, and thus his current dog ownership is merely a shallow and pedantic attempt to cover it up.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Rabbit of Caerbannog on January 06, 2012, 11:21:14 am
...wait what?

Ironbite-no seriously...what?
I know, they've officially made WND look sane by comparison.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: The Right Honourable Mlle Antéchrist on January 06, 2012, 11:31:42 am
Well that's... original.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: GLaDOS on January 06, 2012, 01:44:08 pm
That's ridiculous! Everybody knows that the only two groups with the technology to do that are Black Mesa and Aperture Science, and that list is just about to be reduced by one if everything goes according to plan.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: anti-nonsense on January 06, 2012, 01:48:25 pm
wuh?
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Random Gal on January 06, 2012, 01:51:21 pm
What the FUCK?

I was sure the title of this thread was supposed to be an unrelated attention-getter or sarcasm, but someone actually believes this?

Seriously, what the fuck.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Smurfette Principle on January 06, 2012, 02:05:17 pm
And once he was there, did he go to Pigfarts and ride on Rumbleroar's back?
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Meshakhad on January 06, 2012, 04:39:14 pm
I just read the whole thing. Leaving aside Obama's supposed involvement, they claim that since 1980, the US has had THOUSANDS of people teleport to Mars, with most not surviving. They also claim that there are many dangerous predators on Mars.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Jack Mann on January 06, 2012, 05:23:03 pm
Disbelief aside, I would watch the hell out of a show based on this.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Sigmaleph on January 06, 2012, 05:37:46 pm
Disbelief aside, I would watch the hell out of a show based on this.
Fuck yes.

Also: Here's wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alfred_Webre) on the author. They seem to forget to mention he is conspiracy theorist who believes Earth has time-travel and teleportation technology , which leads me to believe the article was written by a fan.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Oriet on January 06, 2012, 06:34:29 pm
He should have taken the easier option and gone whaling on the moon. Moon blubber!
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Sixth Monarchist on January 06, 2012, 06:49:26 pm
And once he was there, did he go to Pigfarts and ride on Rumbleroar's back?

No. Instead he travelled around the place on a giant golden clock-like vehicle, contemplated his disaffection with humanity, then had an epiphany regarding the miracles of life and realised that he was fated to at least postpone global nuclear war, upon which he returned to Earth.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: ironbite on January 06, 2012, 06:54:57 pm
He should have taken the easier option and gone whaling on the moon. Moon blubber!

Would've solved the energy crisis.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Iczerfour on January 06, 2012, 06:57:31 pm
not possible... Mars Sensors did not detect Humans appearing on mars..  Only data of Intruders Received was Mechanical probes entering thew atmosphere from third Planet "Earth" from the Star known as "SOL"...
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: shykid on January 06, 2012, 07:01:15 pm
I would've submitted it to CTSTDT but someone beat me to it. Still, I really hope it makes the cut.

...that was me, sorry! I stumbled upon Expopolitics the other day (I think someone had posted something else from it on the old forum), and I wound up submitting about 5 or 6 things from there. That whole site is so batshit insane.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Rabbit of Caerbannog on January 06, 2012, 07:45:08 pm
I would've submitted it to CTSTDT but someone beat me to it. Still, I really hope it makes the cut.

...that was me, sorry! I stumbled upon Expopolitics the other day (I think someone had posted something else from it on the old forum), and I wound up submitting about 5 or 6 things from there. That whole site is so batshit insane.
Hey I don't mind, I just hope enough people vote for it.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: shykid on January 06, 2012, 07:47:15 pm
I seriously don't see why it shouldn't. CSTDT quotes just move through pubadmin pretty slowly.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Rabbit of Caerbannog on January 06, 2012, 07:48:29 pm
He should have taken the easier option and gone whaling on the moon. Moon blubber!
We carry a harpoon
And there ain't no whales
So we tell tall tales
And sing a whaling tune
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: TheL on January 06, 2012, 07:55:46 pm
According to the conspiracy nuts at Exopolitics that is. Apparently President Obama during the 1980s, and under the handle of Barry Soetoro, once teleported to the red planet via "jump room" with other volunteers and his entire presidency is a ruse to cover it up. Or something. Try reading the article, it truly is astounding:
http://exopolitics.blogs.com/exopolitics/2011/11/mars-visitors-basiago-and-stillings-confirm-barack-obama-traveled-to-mars-1.html (http://exopolitics.blogs.com/exopolitics/2011/11/mars-visitors-basiago-and-stillings-confirm-barack-obama-traveled-to-mars-1.html)

I would've submitted it to CTSTDT but someone beat me to it. Still, I really hope it makes the cut.

It's Malacandra, and he lived with the Martians for a year.  And the pseudonym was Ransom, damn it!  Get your conspiracy right!
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Thejebusfire on January 06, 2012, 07:58:30 pm
Did they beam him down from the Enterprise?
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Old Viking on January 06, 2012, 08:06:07 pm
There is nothing sinister about Obama's trip. It was a vacation.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Scotsgit on January 06, 2012, 08:10:57 pm
I would've submitted it to CTSTDT but someone beat me to it. Still, I really hope it makes the cut.

...that was me, sorry! I stumbled upon Expopolitics the other day (I think someone had posted something else from it on the old forum), and I wound up submitting about 5 or 6 things from there. That whole site is so batshit insane.

I thought that was batshit insane until I saw this:  http://exopolitics.blogs.com/exopolitics/2012/01/expert-prince-william-is-the-antichrist-future-king-of-one-world-government.html (http://exopolitics.blogs.com/exopolitics/2012/01/expert-prince-william-is-the-antichrist-future-king-of-one-world-government.html)

Quote
The one world government, and Prince William as its putative Head of State, are expected to be essentially a surrogate global state of an Annunaki ET-Illuminati bloodline hierarchy that was installed starting approximately 280,000 according to researchers and archeological monuments such as Adam's Calendar in South Africa.


Oh good grief.......  It gets worse:

Quote
A formal photograph (Exhibit A above), officially released by Buckingham Palace and published on May 31, 2004, depicts Prince William posing in “popular” garb (blue jeans and sweater) with a lamb as he holds its rear cloven hoof is an example of an officially-sanctioned intentional communication by the U.K. Throne from Prince William as the Antichrist, future king of the one world government.

One source states, “On May 31st 2004, the Rothschild-controlled Associated Press, published a photograph world wide, taken by Alistar Grant. The photo shows prince William posing with a lamb like Jesus Christ, who the Bible calls the Lamb of God. What is the significance of this photograph? To the unaware observer, the photograph is perfectly innocent. But to insiders familiar with the Protocols of Zion, Freemasonry and the Book of Revelation, William is identified in the photo as the antichrist.


I get the feeling that these 'insiders' wear tin foil hats a lot.......

Quote
Prince William is the logical choice for King of the one world government

Mr. Kling states, “The logical choice for King of a One World Government would be Prince William son of the goddess Diana. He is under the control of the House of Rothschild and a direct descendant of King David and King Solomon as was Jesus.”


His mother was a Goddess?  I'd hate to meet that religion!

Quote
Rome invades Israel to destroy Zionism

“In the year 70 CE, Roman General Titus invaded Israel and destroyed the Zionist movement against Rome. He laid siege to Jerusalem during Passover and caught the city with almost 2,000,000 people in it. Those who did not starve to death were put to the sword, about 90,000, including the ruling class, or the elite Zionist of all Israel, were taken back to Rome as slaves. History shows that most of the Jewish slaves had purchased themselves our of slavery by the end of the First Century and had begun to assimilate themselves into European society over the years.  Zionism seamed to die out and Israel was no more.


Before anyone can say "Godwin" he blames the Jews.

Quote
Holy Land of Palestine & Knights Templar

“By the start of the Second Millennium, the Church and its subjects had grown in power to the point of wanting the “Holy Land” of Palestine, under Church control. A little known order of Knights comes fourth and spearheads the task. Their first order of business is to take the city of Jerusalem. Again the city is under siege, only this time there are no captives all are put to death and the Knights start digging under the Temple Mount. Who gave them the mission and what were they looking for? How did they know to look for something in the first place and where to look?


Jerusalem fell to the Crusders in the 11th Century.  The Templars were founded in the 12th Century.  Epic research failure.

Quote
“The Templars are best known for their transformation of Europe from wood to stone buildings, some of which will never be duplicated and the banking system, which is said gave them their wealth and put the Monarchs in deep debt, a banking system we still use today.


So badly researched it's painful to read.  No sources for any of this.

I'm stopping there.  He should take the tin foil hat off and take his meds.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Rabbit of Caerbannog on January 06, 2012, 08:41:15 pm
^I say submit it.
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: shykid on January 06, 2012, 08:52:15 pm
SUBMIT THAT SHIT NAO
Title: Re: Obama Once Teleported to Mars
Post by: Shane for Wax on January 06, 2012, 08:59:46 pm
And once he was there, did he go to Pigfarts and ride on Rumbleroar's back?

You stole my joke! >=[ :(