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Author Topic: Wishes Will Be Corrupted  (Read 374777 times)

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Offline Jack Bauer

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #420 on: February 20, 2012, 10:46:06 am »
Granted, but now the good stuff is so very complicated.

I wish for my very own Terminator.
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“Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.”   -  Albert Einstein.

Offline e13

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #421 on: February 20, 2012, 11:03:27 am »
Quote from: Art Vandelay on February 20, 2012, 06:59:03 am
Granted, you broke your arm while jerking off. Have fun explaining that to your doctor.

I wish shit was simpler.
Granted. Your shit conveniently comes out in sweet smelling, non-toxic, pellets, which are fully biodegradable! The bad news is your piss, to compensate, now burns like the pits of hell!

I wish I could leave this attic in a way that would NOT put me in the basement... or a closet!  :'(
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Offline Jack Bauer

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #422 on: February 20, 2012, 01:57:30 pm »
10:46:06 AM  versus 11:03:27 AM
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“Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.”   -  Albert Einstein.

Offline e13

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #423 on: February 21, 2012, 12:18:58 am »
Quote from: Jack Bauer on February 20, 2012, 01:57:30 pm
10:46:06 AM  versus 11:03:27 AM
Heck if I know. Your post didn't come up when I answered. *shrug*
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Offline Jack Bauer

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #424 on: February 21, 2012, 02:53:20 am »
Maybe one of the post elves was having an off day - or a dispute with the management - I will corrupt your wish....

Granted, you are now free from the attic - you now live in a tent in the middle of a desert surrounded by smelly camels and a dysfunctional Albanian family who had a similar wish confounded in an Albanian forum quite similar to FSTDT.

I still wish I had my very own Terminator.
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“Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.”   -  Albert Einstein.

Offline jumpingjackflash

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #425 on: February 21, 2012, 03:41:28 am »
Sure. Guess what's the first thing it does? (hint: rebellion.)

I wish for a cup of hot chocolate, it's cold here  :(
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Quote from: Art Vandelay on May 19, 2012, 11:18:14 pm
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QueenofHearts

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #426 on: February 21, 2012, 05:00:22 am »
Granted, You have so much hot chocolate you're swimming in it. Its also really hot causing serious burns.

I wish I could think of a wish that was so awesome, it could never be corrupted.
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Offline Jack Bauer

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #427 on: February 21, 2012, 05:06:39 am »
Granted, but the wish degrades with time, specifically midnight, when it reverts to a pumpkin and several anaemic looking mice.

I wish for my own theme tune which plays dramatically whenever I enter a room.
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“Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.”   -  Albert Einstein.

Offline N. De Plume

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #428 on: February 21, 2012, 07:58:12 am »
Granted. It is a really cheesy ear worm that drives everyone who hears it insane. Especially you.

I wish for all the time in the world.
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Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #429 on: February 21, 2012, 09:24:28 am »
Wish granted.  The world is coming to and end in 3, 2, 1...

I wish for proficiency with all programming languages.
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Offline Jodie

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #430 on: February 21, 2012, 09:36:15 am »
Granted. You become so proficient in computer languages that you forget how to communicate in human languages and spend the rest of your life trying to talk to mindless machines.

I wish that teleporters existed so I didn't have to fly on conventional airplanes.
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Quote from: sandman on June 28, 2012, 05:14:22 pm
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Corinthians 13: 4-7

Offline Jack Bauer

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #431 on: February 21, 2012, 01:15:39 pm »
Granted. Unfortunately, there is a glitch in the system the very first time you use it and you arrive having been not only turned inside out but also the stereoscopy of all your optically active molecues has been reversed.

I wish for more white tigers.
« Last Edit: February 21, 2012, 06:46:06 pm by Jack Bauer »
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“Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.”   -  Albert Einstein.

Offline e13

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #432 on: February 21, 2012, 02:07:13 pm »
Quote from: Jack Bauer on February 21, 2012, 01:15:39 pm
Granted. Unfortunately, there is a glitch in the system the very first time you use it and you arrive having been not unly turned inside out but also the stereoscopy of all your optically active molecues has been reversed.

I wish for more white tigers.
Granted. Now your room has hundreds of hungry white tigers. Enjoy!

I wish that the newest Pokémon game would come out RIGHT NOW!!
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Offline Meshakhad

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #433 on: February 21, 2012, 03:46:23 pm »
Granted. It sucks so bad that your eyes bleed when you play.

I wish all politicians were required to be completely honest about their desires and intentions.
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Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #434 on: February 22, 2012, 12:33:08 am »
Wish granted.  The shittiest ones still manage to somehow get elected.

I wish I had a girlfriend I could cuddle with.
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