Author Topic: Wishes Will Be Corrupted  (Read 364072 times)

0 Members and 2 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline Her3tiK

  • Suffers in Sanity
  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 1940
  • Gender: Male
  • Learn to Swim
    • HeretiK Productions
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #360 on: February 11, 2012, 12:32:38 pm »
I wish I had a new hard drive.  Preferrably 1 TB minimum.
Granted. It's 50 yottabytes, and from a future that no longer uses any of our current forms of connection. It's usable in about 110 years. And then, it will run as slow as molasses.

I wish I had a green duck::)
Granted, it's full of porn your parents made when you were at school. (You may have beaten me to the punch, e13, but you get this corruption anyways! Bahahaha!)
I wish I had more Magic: The Gathering cards to build decks with.
« Last Edit: February 11, 2012, 12:36:26 pm by Her3tiK »
Her3tik, you have groupies.
Ego: +5

There are a number of ways, though my favourite is simply to take them by surprise. They're just walking down the street, minding their own business when suddenly, WHACK! Penis to the face.

Offline Captain Jack Harkness

  • Petter, Brony, and All-Around Cartoon Addict
  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 2868
  • Gender: Male
  • Or as a friend calls him, Captain Jack Hotness!
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #361 on: February 11, 2012, 12:45:35 pm »
I wish I had a new hard drive.  Preferrably 1 TB minimum.
Granted. It's 50 yottabytes, and from a future that no longer uses any of our current forms of connection. It's usable in about 110 years. And then, it will run as slow as molasses.

I wish I had a green duck::)
Granted, it's full of porn your parents made when you were at school. (You may have beaten me to the punch, e13, but you get this corruption anyways! Bahahaha!)
I wish I had more Magic: The Gathering cards to build decks with.

Wish granted.  They're stolen within a week.  Also, there are two things that ruin the corruption for me:

1.  As long as it's not 2 girls 1 cup nasty, I don't care.
2.  'Tis easy to get rid of.  If the drive was somehow unformattable and the files undeletable or something else to that effect, then maybe it would have a bigger impact.

I wish that Her3tiK was better at corrupting wishes.
My friend's blog.  Check it out!

I blame/credit The Doctor with inspiring my name change.

Offline e13

  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 666
  • Gender: Male
  • Fabulousity is at 100%!
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #362 on: February 11, 2012, 02:52:42 pm »
Granted: No you suck at corrupting wishes.

I wish someone would give me a damn duck. I don't care about the color.  :(

Just Having Some Tea, Hanging With My Friends...

Offline Sleepy

  • Fuck Yes Sunshine In a Bag
  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 4598
  • Gender: Female
  • Danger zone
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #363 on: February 11, 2012, 02:56:40 pm »
Granted, you get a cute wittle duck. You also get thousands of angry people trying to kill you and capture said duck, since he's the last one in existence.

I wish my head would stop spinning.
Guys, this is getting creepy. Can we talk about cannibalism instead?

If a clown eats salmon on Tuesday, how much does a triangle weigh on Jupiter? Ask Mr. Wiggins for 10% off of your next dry cleaning bill. -Hades

Offline Undecided

  • The boring one.
  • Bishop
  • ***
  • Posts: 152
  • Gender: Male
  • Amateur Obfuscator
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #364 on: February 11, 2012, 03:56:42 pm »
Granted. Your head no longer possesses any angular momentum about any central force--your head stops rotating with the earth, stops revolving with the earth about the sun, stops revolving with the sun about the galactic centre, etc. Whether your the rest of your body followed suit is up to you.

I wish for a lone functional copy for the PC of every game in the Final Fantasy series and a PC capable of playing them.
You mad, you lose.

People do not like to think. If one thinks, one must reach conclusions. Conclusions are not always pleasant.
Helen Keller
Le doute n'est pas une condition agréable, mais la certitude est absurde.
Voltaire

Offline Captain Jack Harkness

  • Petter, Brony, and All-Around Cartoon Addict
  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 2868
  • Gender: Male
  • Or as a friend calls him, Captain Jack Hotness!
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #365 on: February 11, 2012, 04:04:38 pm »
Wish granted.  Rabid FF fans go on a riot and publicly kill you for your wish that denies them all FF.

I wish I had a programming job.
My friend's blog.  Check it out!

I blame/credit The Doctor with inspiring my name change.

Offline Meshakhad

  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 2205
  • Gender: Male
  • The Night Is Dark And Full Of Terrors... Like Me
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #366 on: February 11, 2012, 05:34:42 pm »
Granted. You get a job creating computer viruses for Al-Qaeda.

I wish George R.R. Martin supported fanfiction of his works, and that there was a vibrant A Song of Ice and Fire fanfic community.
G-d's Kingdom Is A Hate-Free Zone

Quote from: Reploid Productions
Pardon the interruption, good sir/lady; there are aspects of your behavior that I find quite unbecoming, and I must insist most strenuously that I be permitted to assist in resolving these behaviors through the repeated high-velocity cranial introduction of particularly firm building materials.

Quote from: Meshakhad
GIVE ME KNOWLEDGE OR I WILL PUT A CAP IN YO ASS!

Offline Eniliad

  • Sword And Shield Of The Innocent
  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 1265
  • Gender: Male
  • Perpetually horny cock-slave
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #367 on: February 13, 2012, 05:30:18 pm »
Granted. You get a job creating computer viruses for Al-Qaeda.

I wish George R.R. Martin supported fanfiction of his works, and that there was a vibrant A Song of Ice and Fire fanfic community.

Granted, but half of them crossover with My Little Pony for no explained reason.

I wish to lose precisely 15 pounds of excess body fat from my stomach and neck.
<Miles> "If dildoes are outlawed then only outlaws will have dildoes."
Quote from: Mlle Antéchrist
Yeah, gays cause hurricanes, tits cause earthquakes, and lack of prayer causes tornadoes. Learn to science, people.
Quote from: Mlle Antéchrist
Porn peddlers peddling pedal porn? My life is complete.

Offline e13

  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 666
  • Gender: Male
  • Fabulousity is at 100%!
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #368 on: February 14, 2012, 12:23:57 am »
Granted. You get a job creating computer viruses for Al-Qaeda.

I wish George R.R. Martin supported fanfiction of his works, and that there was a vibrant A Song of Ice and Fire fanfic community.

Granted, but half of them crossover with My Little Pony for no explained reason.

I wish to lose precisely 15 pounds of excess body fat from my stomach and neck.
Granted. The fat switches places so your excess stomach fat is in your neck and vice versa.

I wish Firefly lasted exactly seven Emmy award winning seasons, all staring the regular original cast.

Just Having Some Tea, Hanging With My Friends...

Offline Meshakhad

  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 2205
  • Gender: Male
  • The Night Is Dark And Full Of Terrors... Like Me
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #369 on: February 14, 2012, 12:27:49 am »
Granted. You get a job creating computer viruses for Al-Qaeda.

I wish George R.R. Martin supported fanfiction of his works, and that there was a vibrant A Song of Ice and Fire fanfic community.

Granted, but half of them crossover with My Little Pony for no explained reason.

I wish to lose precisely 15 pounds of excess body fat from my stomach and neck.
Granted. The fat switches places so your excess stomach fat is in your neck and vice versa.

I wish Firefly lasted exactly seven Emmy award winning seasons, all staring the regular original cast.

Granted. But Rupert Murdoch is such a dick that he makes sure it is never released on DVD.

I wish I was a decent artist.
G-d's Kingdom Is A Hate-Free Zone

Quote from: Reploid Productions
Pardon the interruption, good sir/lady; there are aspects of your behavior that I find quite unbecoming, and I must insist most strenuously that I be permitted to assist in resolving these behaviors through the repeated high-velocity cranial introduction of particularly firm building materials.

Quote from: Meshakhad
GIVE ME KNOWLEDGE OR I WILL PUT A CAP IN YO ASS!

QueenofHearts

  • Guest
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #370 on: February 14, 2012, 06:09:54 am »
Granted, you're a decent CON-artist. Unfortunately, you only wished to be decent and not good, so you're arrested and forced to live the next 20 years in prison.

I wish Zinedine Zidane would headbutt John Boehner

Offline Jack Bauer

  • Poetic Badass
  • Pope
  • ****
  • Posts: 448
  • Gender: Male
  • On Craggy Island, under deep cover.
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #371 on: February 14, 2012, 08:36:51 am »
Granted - he does it at a sporting personalities gala dinner at the Whitehouse and the security people overreact resulting in the deaths of Tiger Woods and a number of penguins who got lost on a tour.

I wish that there was a real River Tam who could break into Rupert Murdoch's secret Firelfy stash and steal the masters of the other six seasons - and release them to DVD!
Part wolf, part pirate.



“Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That's relativity.”   -  Albert Einstein.

Offline e13

  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 666
  • Gender: Male
  • Fabulousity is at 100%!
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #372 on: February 14, 2012, 09:17:06 am »
Granted - he does it at a sporting personalities gala dinner at the Whitehouse and the security people overreact resulting in the deaths of Tiger Woods and a number of penguins who got lost on a tour.

I wish that there was a real River Tam who could break into Rupert Murdoch's secret Firelfy stash and steal the masters of the other six seasons - and release them to DVD!
Granted. But she "releases" them only in a pig-latin dub. You know, for the lulz!

I wish I had some dignity.

Just Having Some Tea, Hanging With My Friends...

Offline Captain Jack Harkness

  • Petter, Brony, and All-Around Cartoon Addict
  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 2868
  • Gender: Male
  • Or as a friend calls him, Captain Jack Hotness!
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #373 on: February 14, 2012, 09:44:42 am »
Wish granted.  You have dignity for five seconds before it's torn away from you in the cruelest possible manner.

I wish I could take 2 minute showers to get clean.
My friend's blog.  Check it out!

I blame/credit The Doctor with inspiring my name change.

Offline N. De Plume

  • Mysterious Writing Implement
  • The Beast
  • *****
  • Posts: 1936
  • Gender: Male
  • Nom, nom, nom…
Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #374 on: February 14, 2012, 10:15:39 am »
Granted. It now takes you twenty minutes to brush your teeth.

I wish the winnings on my iPod Klondike Solitaire could be converted to real, legal-tender US dollars.
-A Pen Name