Author Topic: Wishes Will Be Corrupted  (Read 364794 times)

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Offline Julian

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1440 on: January 25, 2013, 04:18:28 am »
Granted, but the universe hates you for wearing neon stretch lycra everywhere... You also have a thyroid problem and water retention issues...

I wish I'd been more specific with my previous wish:
- I wish that we had a space elevator, and could vote one irredeemable idiot off the pale blue dot oasis a day...

Art Vandelay

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1441 on: January 25, 2013, 07:20:15 am »
Granted. Turns out that idiots breed fast enough to more than outpace one per day.

I wish for some Nutella.

Offline ThunderWulf

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1442 on: January 25, 2013, 07:41:28 am »
Granted, but it's all WAY past the expiration date and you get some uber bad food poisoning.

I wish that I was more awake.
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Offline R. U. Sirius

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1443 on: January 25, 2013, 08:29:22 am »
Granted. You never sleep again, for fear of a sloth eating your toes.

I wish for one of the kennel jobs I've applied for to work out.
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If you look at it logically, cannibalism has great potential to simultaneously solve our overpopulation and food shortage problems.

Offline Random Gal

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1444 on: January 26, 2013, 04:22:29 pm »
Granted. The dogs are all inexplicably attracted to your pants.

I wish Batman was real.

Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1445 on: January 26, 2013, 06:53:29 pm »
Wish granted.  All of the villains are real, and they murder your family while you watch helplessly.

I wish Anonymous would dissolve and anyone identifying with these cyberterrorist shitheads would become terminally ill.
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Offline ThunderWulf

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1446 on: January 26, 2013, 07:17:16 pm »
Granted, but it turns out that some of the things Anonymous did were actually good and the world gets overrun by corrupt shitheads.

I wish that I had someone to jam with right now.
a.k.a. TGRwulf
"hehehehe. you said member." ~ Shepard/Booker
"it's kind of like my right left hand on a sunday every night. How so? It beats the fuck out of me!" ~ Saturn500
"Drinking, fighting, fucking...they basically outlawed 99% of the lifestyle of your typical Irishman.  Much less your typical Viking." ~ RavynousHunter

Offline Indikins

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1447 on: January 26, 2013, 11:44:57 pm »
Granted, but this person likes jamming with you so much that they move into your home, get pictures of you in compromising situations and blackmail you into jamming with them every day for six hours for the rest of your life.

I wish for Pokemon to be real.
I once had a nightmare about chickens pecking me to death on my driveway. I told my sister to save herself.

This is the #1 nightmare.

Art Vandelay

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1448 on: January 26, 2013, 11:50:15 pm »
Granted. But they only exist in Japan and New York.

I wish I could smack people through the internet.

Offline rookie

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1449 on: January 27, 2013, 12:19:00 am »
Granted, but they can smack you back.

I wish there was something good on TV right now.
The difference between 0 and 1 is infinite. The difference between 1 and a million is a matter of degree. - Zack Johnson

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I'll stop eating beef lamb and pork the same day they start letting me eat vegetarians.

Art Vandelay

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1450 on: January 27, 2013, 02:41:31 am »
Granted, but there's a 5:1 ads to show ratio.

I wish it wasn't so humid.

Offline Indikins

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1451 on: January 27, 2013, 04:21:00 am »
Granted. All the water in the world spontaneously evaporates, leaving empty oceans and swatches of dead animals and vegetation.

I wish that had been popular enough for new seasons to be made.
I once had a nightmare about chickens pecking me to death on my driveway. I told my sister to save herself.

This is the #1 nightmare.

Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1452 on: January 27, 2013, 04:26:13 am »
Wish granted.  Since you didn't specify a "that," I'll just assume you meant Jersey Shore!

I wish I could get any job I wanted with zero effort.
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I blame/credit The Doctor with inspiring my name change.

Offline Indikins

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1453 on: January 27, 2013, 04:29:52 am »
Granted, but you are fired from every job you get due to not putting in effort while on the job.

I wish my brain had not editted out the word "Firefly" in my previous wish.
I once had a nightmare about chickens pecking me to death on my driveway. I told my sister to save herself.

This is the #1 nightmare.

Offline Captain Jack Harkness

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Re: Wishes Will Be Corrupted
« Reply #1454 on: January 27, 2013, 04:40:43 am »
Wish granted.  It doesn't change the fact that I already used my magic to extend Jersey Shore.  Also, that wish has now expired, so it is no longer useful for actually getting Firefly back.

I wish we would learn that all previous presidents had really weird fetishes, if nothing more than just for the hell of it.
My friend's blog.  Check it out!

I blame/credit The Doctor with inspiring my name change.