Author Topic: I hate GPG and its variants  (Read 5527 times)

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Offline The Illusive Man

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I hate GPG and its variants
« on: July 09, 2013, 12:45:41 am »

I hate, hate, hate Linux to the point of rage due to it being an example of not learning from history. Normally I would say learn from the Unix Wars, but it is too late for that. History has once again repeated itself due to willful ignorance. This is a problem because in order to have a fair comparison of GPG I have to use multiple versions of Linux.

For example, GPG (Gpg4win, version 2.1.1 (2013-05-28)) is crap because:
You have to fuck around with root certificates in the year 2013.
(click to show/hide)


64 bit incompatibility in the year 2013
(click to show/hide)


But wait it gets worse!
GPG 2.X is unable to generate 4096 bit RSA keys, 3072 is the limit.
Signature strength capped as SHA-2 256.


The possibility that GPG was better on Linux existed and I needed to test it for the sake of fairness. Multiple Linux operating systems were installed as VMWare virtual machines. VMWare is used because effort is enacted to try and support Linux broadly, my deepest sympathies for those unfortunate bastards. Unsurprisingly, it all those problems seen in the Windows version of GPG exist and are worse on Linux too! Examples:

openSUSE12.3 64bit
Segfault, generated key lost. Aaawwww I wanted to see what horror was spawned from my attempt to generate 4096 DSS/DH key :(. Because that is an option despite DSS/DH not working that way. Of course any attempt to generate any key causes a segfault.
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-6YuLbbvms" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-6YuLbbvms</a>


Linux Mint 15 "Olivia" Cinnamon 64bit
Same as above.


I tried Ubuntu 13.04 Desktop (64-bit), the fucking comedy option, but it would not install and boot properly.
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVaWniu1w1U" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVaWniu1w1U</a>
« Last Edit: July 09, 2013, 01:34:18 pm by The Illusive Man »
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Offline R. U. Sirius

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Re: I hate GPG and its variants
« Reply #1 on: July 09, 2013, 12:57:21 am »
The only thing I have to say is, OMFG, WTF HAPPENED TO THAT MAN'S NECK!?
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Offline Alehksunos

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Re: I hate GPG and its variants
« Reply #2 on: July 09, 2013, 01:04:41 am »
Photoshop, my good friend.

Offline Dakota Bob

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Re: I hate GPG and its variants
« Reply #3 on: July 09, 2013, 07:26:00 am »

Offline RavynousHunter

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Re: I hate GPG and its variants
« Reply #4 on: July 09, 2013, 07:52:12 am »
While Linux does have the occasional use, I have to admit that this does seem...rather brainless for someone to develop something so limited in a time where automation and ease-of-use are king.  Then again, I know a college comp sci department that uses a CLI-based dev environment.  The only classes that don't are based around R and Java...even web development was handled in a command-line interface.  In the age of things like Visual Studio, Eclipse, and Qt, there's really no excuse for that bullshit.
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Offline The Illusive Man

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Re: I hate GPG and its variants
« Reply #5 on: July 09, 2013, 01:44:59 pm »
Normally I would say, “wow I can’t believe it took them this long to support SSD caching” but repeated exposure to Linux and the associated communities has taught me to know better.
Despite knowing about indoctrination I thought it was a good idea to put a human Reaper near my office. Now I am a sentient husk :(.

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Offline Ironchew

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Re: I hate GPG and its variants
« Reply #6 on: July 11, 2013, 06:54:48 pm »


(Oh boy, another software infidel...)

Learn the ways of Stallman, The Illusive Man, and you will see that these complaints are really Freedom features (or Freatures as I like to call them):

For example, GPG (Gpg4win, version 2.1.1 (2013-05-28)) is crap

Not surprising. It's the Windows port (or as I like to call it, the concession made to proprietary hell). If you want to exercise the true power of PGP and its brood, may I suggest a more Free operating system, such as gnusense, or Trisquel?

The possibility that GPG was better on Linux existed and I needed to test it for the sake of fairness. Multiple Linux operating systems were installed as VMWare virtual machines. VMWare is used because effort is enacted to try and support Linux broadly, my deepest sympathies for those unfortunate bastards.

Linux is not meant to have broad interoperability. True users value choice and flexibility over convenience; besides, learning an entirely new architecture keeps your beard growing.

But wait it gets worse!
GPG 2.X is unable to generate 4096 bit RSA keys, 3072 is the limit.

Silly Illusive Man. With enough spare time (the exact amount will be left undisclosed) and command-line tinkering ("Terminal vision-questing" is a term I prefer for these intrepid excursions), it just takes a one-liner to generate a 4096-bit keypair. 3072 bits may sound like a limitation, until you realize that the greatest computers of today are still having trouble with 2048-bit keys. Your secret is safe for at least a couple more decades, and if it needs to be secret for longer than that, you should consider the use of unbreakable encryption methods such as a one-time pad.

I tried Ubuntu 13.04 Desktop (64-bit), the fucking comedy option

Ubuntu gives my beard nightmares.

So, with that, you should have the power to boldly sift through manpages and find the answers to life's persistent questions. Don't forget your daily offerings to the Church of Emacs. 'Til then, ciao!

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Re: I hate GPG and its variants
« Reply #7 on: July 11, 2013, 07:32:34 pm »
*popcorn*
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Offline Askold

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Re: I hate GPG and its variants
« Reply #8 on: July 12, 2013, 02:17:45 am »
The problem seems to be that TIM is judging GPG software as if it was a commercial product.

Linux is made by the users and if you see something that you do not like then, you can just fix it by yourself. I mean if Microsoft makes a program that is unusable garbage then the customers can complain about it or simply vote with their wallet and not buy it. But GPG software is meant to be freely modifiable and made for free to boot, so why on earth do you get a GPG program if you aren't willing to do some tinkering to it? Either use the free version made by the userbase, fix it yourself or get a different operating system.

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Offline MadmanJohnson

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Re: I hate GPG and its variants
« Reply #9 on: July 12, 2013, 05:59:46 am »
/evangelist Have you heard the Good News? No, not that! The gospel of LINUX! Linux is the cure for cancer!Linux will exorcise those Windows demons that possess you! Buy Linux! LINUX IS THE ONLY TRUE RELIGION-I mean Web Browser!
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Offline Igor

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Re: I hate GPG and its variants
« Reply #10 on: July 12, 2013, 07:03:29 am »
..except that you don't buy it and it's an OS, not a browser. </foolishlytakingthebait>


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Re: I hate GPG and its variants
« Reply #11 on: July 12, 2013, 01:56:47 pm »
*opens up the bar and settles next to Magus*
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Offline The Illusive Man

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Re: I hate GPG and its variants
« Reply #12 on: July 13, 2013, 05:11:53 pm »
Those pseudo troll responses have an almost COLA flavor to them. Good job guys.
Despite knowing about indoctrination I thought it was a good idea to put a human Reaper near my office. Now I am a sentient husk :(.

*RRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRR* *SCREECH* *smokes*


Offline Ironchew

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Re: I hate GPG and its variants
« Reply #13 on: July 13, 2013, 09:00:24 pm »
Those pseudo troll responses have an almost COLA flavor to them. Good job guys.

If I may interject:

no u

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Offline Rime

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Re: I hate GPG and its variants
« Reply #14 on: July 14, 2013, 02:15:52 pm »
I've used older distros of Vector Linux and Ubuntu.  They run quite good for a free operating system since I only have single core processors.  I have also used terrible distros like DSL and TinyCore where I uninstalled them after trying to get them to work for three days.   Someone was getting pretty eager for me to try out Arch if I didn't happen to have a copy of Windows 7, but seriously, I'm not sure I want to have a windows box open right beside it to help walk me through setting it up.
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